Review: The Last Stand (2013)

January 21, 2013 Reviews No Comments

Cast: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Forest Whitaker, Johnny Knoxville
Director: Jee-woon Kim
Country: USA
Genre: Action | Crime | Thriller
Official Trailer: Here

For an additional perspective on The Last Stand, see Mel Valentin’s review

There must have been a run on stereotypical border-townsfolk at the cliché factory when Jee-woon Kim cobbled together his cast of colorful characters for The Last Stand. And I’m not even including Arnold Schwarzenegger, back in the saddle as a leading action star. This time he has another extremely-not-Austrian name, Ray Owens, but this is not your father’s Ahhhnuld. This is a new old Arnie, full of self mockery and irony, yet here he is part of a cast of wacky types and humor and violence just like we were back in 1988 again.

That isn’t to say The Last Stand is up there with his most ludicrously enjoyable action extravaganzas like Commando, The Running Man, or Eraser. Think more Raw Deal or The 6th Day to gauge the scale here.

That isn’t to say The Last Stand is up there with his most ludicrously enjoyable action extravaganzas like Commando, The Running Man, or Eraser. Think more Raw Deal or The 6^th Day to gauge the scale here. The story—ha!—takes place in a sleepy Arizona border town where not much happens: you know the one. The town is so aimless it seems to be run by a deputy (Luis Guzman, never afraid to hide away his actual talent in order to serve a type) and one Sheriff Owens, a semi-retired LAPD officer who left after—wait for it—something went wrong on a deal and his partner got the worst of it. Yes, we aren’t going to leave the well too far, unless you consider adding Johnny Knoxville into the mix as the local gun nut a departure from formula. I don’t.

Meanwhile, an escape is in progress. A notorious drug lord has fled a courthouse and is headed for the border. I wonder if he will go through Owens’ neighborhood… The FBI Agent hot on the heels of the escaped drug lord and his convoy of super fast Corvettes (I feel like a pre-teen telling a story), John Bannister, is played by Forest Whitaker in another role which manages to mystify me. Of course Ray gets wind of the oncoming trouble and works to defend his town from such harried villainy. This is where Schwarzenegger still manages to shine in the role of amped up hero. Even in his old age his biceps look like two globes, and now he knows how to make fun of himself.

Blood splatters in some creative ways, and one-liners are not hard to come by in this little Arizona town. There’s a great deal of action set pieces strung together by wafer-thin dialogue and characterizations that never matter in these types of films.

It sounds ridiculous, I know, but that’s the beauty of The Last Stand. It is ridiculous and it knows so, and it manages to toe that delicate line between boring action and entertaining violence fairly well. Blood splatters in some creative ways, and one-liners are not hard to come by in this little Arizona town. There’s a great deal of action set pieces strung together by wafer-thin dialogue and characterizations that never matter in these types of films. If the spoken words aren’t going to mean much in the end, why not take the route of The Last Stand and at least make it funny to hear?

65/100 ~ OKAY. The Last Stand is ridiculous and it knows so, and it manages to toe that delicate line between boring action and entertaining violence fairly well.

By Larry Taylor

Ever since I was a child I have had an obscene obsession with film. After seeing Superman II as a five-year old, I have made it my mission to absorb as many films in as many genres from as many moments in time as I can. And over the years, there are films which have continued to shape my cinematic consciousness. I love discussing film, and I hope you enjoy discussing it along with me. You can read my work on themoviesnob.net as well.